Newsflash: Pregnant Lady Delivers Baby!

Once upon a time, a long time ago it seems, I was pregnant. Then I was very pregnant, then I was super pregnant. Then, and this is where it gets exciting, I had a baby. Who would have imagined I could do something like that? Without drugs, even! Of course there were a lot of grunts and bodily fluids involved with that part, which I will tell you about if you really want to know, however I won't post the story just yet.

Now I have a son. We'll call him That Baby, because that tends to be how I refer to him around other people anyway. You know, "there's That Baby I delivered." or "That Baby threw up on me again." It's a whirlwind life with a 3.5 month old who spits up a lot. Feedings, diaper changes and vomit, oh my.

The great secret about all this, the thing that I want to wrap up in my pocket and keep close forever, is that I feel like I've stepped into the best poem I ever read, or into one of those fiery sunsets you see on travel billboards, and I don't want it to end. I am inside of a dream, inside of magic, inside of the world instead of being merely a bystander. I am living now in the most present way I possibly can, in the place I tried to reach for years with all the job changes and graduate school and self examination and whatever else it was I did to try and find meaning in the random passages of my life.

I like this person I've become. I'm excited to see where the story goes from here. I'll try to post a little more often so you all can ride along with me.

Newsflash: Pregnant Lady Spotted at Yellowstone National Park

oh.my.gawd I am, like, totally pregnant! It's true, people, or at least the ultrasound suggests that there is a tiny human growing in my abdomen and not, say, a big spider. I am due to erupt around April 1st.

As I am a biologist and I am trained to report on these sorts of details, I must note that this new human is behaving an awful lot like a parasite. So far I have found that it controls my appetite, my hormones, and sometimes even my behavior. I am entirely helpless to stop it! This means that for several months now I have been crying over every sappy TV commercial and eating meals made up entirely of pickled foods and dairy products. Mmmmmm... pickles.

Sometime soon, I expect to have to sign over a kidney and the rights to my 401(k). Wait, maybe that's AFTER the birth. Being pregnant has so addled my brain I can't remember anything anymore, like that I have a blog and I need to update it periodically. Therefore, if you want news you may need to (gently) remind me about it.

Anyway peeps, I am also mostly-unemployed (that post is forthcoming, promise!), which means maybe I'll update more than once a quarter. Maybe. As with all things in my life these days, we'll just have to see.