Newsflash: Pregnant Lady Delivers Baby!

Once upon a time, a long time ago it seems, I was pregnant. Then I was very pregnant, then I was super pregnant. Then, and this is where it gets exciting, I had a baby. Who would have imagined I could do something like that? Without drugs, even! Of course there were a lot of grunts and bodily fluids involved with that part, which I will tell you about if you really want to know, however I won't post the story just yet.

Now I have a son. We'll call him That Baby, because that tends to be how I refer to him around other people anyway. You know, "there's That Baby I delivered." or "That Baby threw up on me again." It's a whirlwind life with a 3.5 month old who spits up a lot. Feedings, diaper changes and vomit, oh my.

The great secret about all this, the thing that I want to wrap up in my pocket and keep close forever, is that I feel like I've stepped into the best poem I ever read, or into one of those fiery sunsets you see on travel billboards, and I don't want it to end. I am inside of a dream, inside of magic, inside of the world instead of being merely a bystander. I am living now in the most present way I possibly can, in the place I tried to reach for years with all the job changes and graduate school and self examination and whatever else it was I did to try and find meaning in the random passages of my life.

I like this person I've become. I'm excited to see where the story goes from here. I'll try to post a little more often so you all can ride along with me.

Newsflash: Pregnant Lady Spotted at Yellowstone National Park

oh.my.gawd I am, like, totally pregnant! It's true, people, or at least the ultrasound suggests that there is a tiny human growing in my abdomen and not, say, a big spider. I am due to erupt around April 1st.

As I am a biologist and I am trained to report on these sorts of details, I must note that this new human is behaving an awful lot like a parasite. So far I have found that it controls my appetite, my hormones, and sometimes even my behavior. I am entirely helpless to stop it! This means that for several months now I have been crying over every sappy TV commercial and eating meals made up entirely of pickled foods and dairy products. Mmmmmm... pickles.

Sometime soon, I expect to have to sign over a kidney and the rights to my 401(k). Wait, maybe that's AFTER the birth. Being pregnant has so addled my brain I can't remember anything anymore, like that I have a blog and I need to update it periodically. Therefore, if you want news you may need to (gently) remind me about it.

Anyway peeps, I am also mostly-unemployed (that post is forthcoming, promise!), which means maybe I'll update more than once a quarter. Maybe. As with all things in my life these days, we'll just have to see.

You know you're a nerd when...

You know how I know I'm a nerd? When I looked at the bottom of the test and saw that I scored above the 99th percentile for nerd AND geek AND dork, I though to myself "Hey, I did great on this test. Awesome!"

Your Score: Pure Nerd

91 % Nerd, 39% Geek, 34% Dork

For The Record:



A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.

A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.

A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.



You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd.



The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful.



Congratulations!





Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Secretly, I am an old bearded wizard.

If you had asked me, I would have said that Hermione was my alter-ego, however it appears that I have managed to grow up at least a little bit since turning 30.

You scored as Albus Dumbledore. Strong and powerful, you admirably defend your world and your charges against those who would seek to harm them. However sometimes you can fail to do what you must because you care too much to cause suffering. Albus Dumbledore 95% Hermione Granger 75% Severus Snape 70% Draco Malfoy 65% Harry Potter 60% Remus Lupin 60% Sirius Black 50% Ron Weasley 35% Ginny Weasley 25% Lord Voldemort 15% Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...? created with QuizFarm.com

I knew it!

Even though this is so last year, I just had to post it. I must caution you that the lyrics are hilarious but slightly inappropriate for work--just trust me and put on your headphones. The song originally hails from the Broadway musical "Avenue Q". The geek in me insists that I close with "For the Horde!", because that's just the kind of WoW player that I am.